


Burn

by daimonas



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, One Shot, Other, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-17
Updated: 2017-03-17
Packaged: 2018-10-06 10:17:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10332380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daimonas/pseuds/daimonas
Summary: “I loved him, once…”The confession shocks Shiro into stillness. Haggar walks a few paces and pauses, letting out a heavy sigh. She turns to Shiro and, for the first time, her face is vulnerable. Any traces of the malice she had shown only moments prior were completely gone, replaced instead by an expression that begshelp me.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Work-inspired music [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CFOuGqBSEE).

Growing up, Shiro always believed that when he died, he would see it coming from a million miles away. He would be brave, and greet death like an old friend with open arms. He never expected to be facing death so soon – alone, and in a darkness so suffocating that it writhed like a living, breathing force in his mind, threatening to steal the air from his lungs.

He is going to die here, and he is fucking terrified.

He is terrified because he failed – as a leader, as a friend, as a lover. Everyone had been depending on him to lead the final fight against Zarkon, to get them out of there _alive_ and to win the day, and he had failed them. He doesn’t even know if anyone made it out. All he can remember before blacking out is Zarkon in his mind, a blinding light, and then… nothing. He woke in darkness and has been in darkness ever since.

_I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry._

_Please forgive me._

_Oh, God, I’m never going to see him again._

_I’m never going to see Keith again._

_I’m going to die and I’m never going to be able to tell him –_

There’s a loud screech of a door opening and Shiro is momentarily blinded with dull light. He holds an arm up to shield his eyes from the sudden affront on his vision, only to have a strong hand grasp his elbow and haul him to his feet as if he weighs nothing. He grunts at the sudden movement, and winces when his arm is yanked behind his back at a sharp angle. When he finally turns his eyes back to the blinding light, his vision has adjusted and his heart drops when he sees who is standing in the doorway.

“Black Paladin, fortune smiles on you today,” Haggar says, a ghost of a smile on her otherwise haunting features.

Shiro remains silent. Death is inevitable at this point, and he knows it. There’s no use wasting his breath.

Haggar’s smile dissipates and she turns without saying another word. The sentry holding Shiro pushes him forward to trail behind Haggar. They walk in silence through dimly-lit corridors for what seems like an eternity. Shiro watches his feet as he walks, counting his steps. He counts two hundred and thirty-eight before Haggar next speaks.

“You will find the other Paladins in the eighth sector of Malin 1. So long as you stay true to your course, you should reach them within a day.”

Shiro looks up, his eyebrows creased in confusion. Quietly, he asks, “You’re.. helping me?”

“Do not make me change my mind by asking stupid questions,” Haggar snaps, causing Shiro to bite down his next question. “If you swear to me that you will not run, I will let my sentry release you.”

“I won’t run.”

Without looking back, Haggar nods, and Shiro’s arm is released. He rolls his shoulder, rubbing at a sore spot at the base of his neck. He moves his eyes to Haggar, wary at her sudden change of heart. Why help him? What is she benefitting from by doing this? If anything, Zarkon will find out who released him, and she will lose her life.

“You could die for this.”

“I know.”

“Then _why – “_

Haggar whirls and, before Shiro can blink, has him by the throat. She throws him against the wall, her thin fingers closing tight around his windpipe. “Did I not tell you to _not_ ask stupid questions?”

Shiro’s eyes clench closed at the sudden wave of pain, and he coughs – gasping for air. He had known Haggar to be a talented mage, but he had never once thought she had such strength about her. When he coughs again, she loosens her grip and lets him fall. He sinks to his knees, clutching at his throat, and breathes in heaving breaths. When his lungs are sufficiently filled, he stands and faces Haggar. Determined, he says, “I need to understand why you’re helping me.”

“You humans are so stubborn. What does it benefit you to know why I am helping you?”

“Because you could be leading me into a trap. I’m not just going to walk into it blindly.”

“If I was leading you into a trap, do you not think that you would be dead by now?”

Shiro hesitates. “You’re Zarkon’s most trusted advisor, yet you’re helping the number one threat to his rule escape his dungeons. Are you so surprised that I’m skeptical?”

Haggar lets out a frustrated growl and turns from him. She begins walking and Shiro hurries to follow. They walk in silence for thirty paces before she finally speaks again. When she does, her voice is quiet – so quiet that Shiro almost misses what she says.

“I loved him, once…”

The confession shocks Shiro into stillness. Haggar walks a few paces and pauses, letting out a heavy sigh. She turns to Shiro and, for the first time, her face is vulnerable. Any traces of the malice she had shown only moments prior are completely gone, replaced instead by an expression that begs _help me._

“You mean Zarkon?”

Haggar nods, and her eyes close. “He has not always been as he is now. Once, he was a man that many admired. Temperamental at times, and impulsive – but he was intelligent, and when he spoke, the world stopped to listen. It reminds you of someone, does it not?”

Shiro swallows and shakes off the comparison. _Keith is nothing like Zarkon._ “What does this have to do with you rescuing me?”

Haggar finally opens her eyes then and, when her eyes meet Shiro’s, she smiles. Shiro thinks he’s never seen anything so sad. He can almost see Haggar’s age shining through her smile – ten thousand years of anger, loneliness, and sadness manifesting themselves in the gesture – but, above all, he sees love. A love so great that he could only hope to experience it at some point in his lifetime. In her smile, Shiro can see the love she’s held onto for ten thousand years. He can see its beauty, and its grief; its happiness, and its sorrow; its hope, and its demise.

He can see the world in her smile, and he feels lost.

“You have seen Zarkon at his worst. He is no longer the man I once loved. I have lived a long life, Takashi Shirogane. I grow tired and I would like to see the man I loved once again in this lifetime. You are my only hope of that wish being granted.”

“But – “

“Now is not the time for arguments. The next sentry will be by soon, and you must be gone before then. Continue down this path until another opens to your right. At the end of that path, you will find your escape pod. Now go.”

Shiro hesitates. He can’t leave, not without some kind of answers. “Why follow him? If he’s done such awful things that he’s twisted from the man he used to be.”

Haggar tilts her head and eyes him curiously. “Would you not do the same for the man you love? Would you not follow him to the ends of the earth, no matter the cost? Would you not give up everything – including yourself – to let him achieve his dreams?”

Shiro shakes his head, but then stops. It’s easy for him to think of Keith as someone _good_ – but what if he woke up one day, and suddenly Keith wasn’t? Would he really leave Keith then? Or would he stay by his side and try to save him?

The answer to his questions stills his heart.

Haggar gives him a knowing nod before turning away. “Life is not always in black and white, young Paladin. There is neither true good, nor true evil. There is goodness in all of us, and evil in the best of us. You would be wise to remember that.”

Without another word, she turns to leave.

Shiro doesn’t waste anymore time, and finally runs toward hope.

\-----

Haggar watches from the shadows as the Paladin escapes to his pod. Only when he is safely inside does she return to her post.

As she walks, she reaches into her robe to pull out the locket hanging around her neck. She opens the round trinket with a _click_ and stares fondly at its contents. In it, a young Altean with white hair smiles happily into a Galran’s eyes. The Galran is smiling back and his expression is filled with such love that Haggar’s heart breaks.

She had once known that love intimately. Now, all she had to her were its embers.

With a sigh, she closes the locket once more and tucks it back into her robe.

_Fight hard, young Paladin. And may you know the love that I once held dear._

_Save me._

**Author's Note:**

> Honestly this was super gratuitous. I just really love the idea of Haggar loving Zarkon, because it hurts me and I apparently love the pain. This is probably super ooc but I needed it in my life so here it is. Sorry not sorry.


End file.
